Dad's Words of Wisdom

 

For Mother’s Day I had a long list of things that momma said.  I cannot do the same for Father’s Day.  Daddy told me more things than momma did, but most of them cannot be published in this article.  Daddy’s vocabulary was mostly vulgar words, barnyard terminology.  His language was crude and base before his salvation.  Daddy was very outspoken and one did not have to wonder where or how he stood on a subject.  Here are a few words of wisdom that are permissible:

Your generation has no gumption.

Kids your age are sorry and don’t know how to work.

If the sun don’t come up, what are you going to do about it?

If you don’t stop walking on the sides of your feet, you’ll be cripple by the time you're fifty.

You’d better say yes mam, no mam, yes sir, no sir.

Always take up for those who can’t take up for themselves.

You better not make fun of handicapped or disabled.

Dead folks can’t hurt you, it’s living ones that do.

If you made the bed, you gotta sleep in it.

It will rain when the Master gets ready for it to rain.

Cutting firewood warms you twice.

If you get in jail, you will stay there.

Don’t point that gun at anything unless you intend to kill it.

You can stay at home as long as you want, but you got to help your momma with groceries.

Take that hat off at the table.

Somebody say grace (This was for every meal.)

There is no such thing as a free meal.

If the government gives you something, they will tell you how to live.

You will vote and register for the draft, too many men and women died for our rights.

Treat people like you want to be treated.

A bought lesson is a learned lesson.

Hindsight is always 20/20.

In a hundred years, who gives a care?

 

Daddy taught me about life.  My love for history, motorcycles, and hot rods come from daddy.  He taught me how to split firewood with an ax and how to run a chain saw to cut paperwood.  He taught me how to repair junk, which most folks refer to as “rigging” but I call it “fixin’.”  He taught me to respect people, especially adults and old folks.  He taught me respect of guns and how to use them, especially killing hogs, and then butchering them.  He taught me how to handle a bully; you beat the snot out of them. 

He taught me generosity.  I remember when planting corn by hand daddy would say, “One for the Master, one for the birds, one to rot, and one for me.”  Daddy shared our garden with everyone.  He was always willing to give folks a “mess of corn, peas, okra,” etc.  When folks helped us “kill hogs,” daddy always made sure that they got a “mess of meat.”  He knew whom and who not to tell, “Get all you want.”  Some people were like a plague of locusts when given the opportunity to “get a mess.” Daddy lived this way: Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously (II Corinthians 9:6 NIV).

The Bible speaks of generosity:

 

Give generously to him and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the LORD your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to. Deuteronomy 15:10

 

The wicked borrow and do not repay, but the righteous give generously; Psalm 37:21

 

You will be made rich in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.  This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of God's people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God (II Corinthians 9:11-12 NIV).

"I Will Never Forget When Dad Passed Away"

Even though I carry the Hopper name, I resemble my mother’s side of the family.  Grandpaw Chapman, momma’s daddy, was a tall lean man and mom had his features, but her brother and four sisters were short as was Grandmoe Chapman.

Grandpaw called my momma “Long Legged Sally” and she was the other son.  Momma could out wrestle, out hit, and outwork her brother and sisters.  She was bonafide “Tom Boy” and Grandpaw chose her as “the pick of the litter.”  It was no secret that momma was his favorite.  Momma also was a Daddy’s girl and loved Grandpaw very much.

I remember when daddy was unemployed.  Grandpaw would drive up to our house and have a load of groceries in his 1950 Plymouth for us.  I have fond memories of riding in the rear seat of his that old Plymouth as he and momma went to the Calera State Bank to sign co-sign a loan for momma.  I still have that old Plymouth.  That car, the property where my home is, my looks, and memories are the only things of Grandpaw Chapman that I have.

Grandpaw Chapman was born in 1892 and died of cancer in 1964.  He served in the Army, but never saw action in World War I due to having the measles.  He worked at a sawmill and farmed.  He never owned a tractor and farmed using a mule.

A family friend, J B Popwell, said that when he was a little boy that he saw Grandpaw Chapman plowing in the field and the mule sulked and refused to plow.  Grandpaw beat the mule and the mule sat down.  J B said Grandpaw grabbed the long ears of that old mule and bit the mule’s nose.  J B said Grandpaw drew blood and had meat from the mule’s nose in his teeth.  J B said the mule rose on his hind legs several times trying to shake Grandpaw from his nose. 

It makes me wonder about Balaam, hired by the Ammonites and Moabites, hitting his donkey while on his way to curse the Israel.  I do not think that Grandpaw was on his way to curse someone, but if I know my Grandpaw, there was a whole lot of cussing directed at the mule.

Grandpaw Chapman did not receive Christ as Savior until he was on his deathbed.  His conversion was the first time I ever heard of “Death Bed Confession.”  Brother Calvin Crocker was faithful to visit Grandpaw and shared the plan of Salvation with him.  Grandpaw did not live long after his conversion.

Grandpaw was the first family member I remember dying.  Momma was very heartbroken at his death.  I had never seen her cry like that before.  Moved by immense emotion, she wrote a song about his dying.  She would sing it many times after his passing.  When momma died, her cousins sang the song at her funeral.  I hope you enjoy it.

I'll never forget when dad pasted away
Not a word from his mouth to us he could say
He knew that we loved him and listened to us cry
but now he is resting way up in the sky
                   (Chorus)
There's a bright star that is shining
it's shining so bright
It went to heaven early one night
The angels are singing with God's Great Band
And I know Dad's resting in the Promise Land

There was a black cloud gathered in the Northwest,
for God was telling us he knew best
He sweep down here and carried him away
And now he is resting with God today
                  (Chorus)
There's a bright star that is shining
it's shining so bright
It went to heaven early one night
The angels are singing with God's Great Band
And I know Dad's resting in the Promise Land

Mother is weeping since Dad went away
She is hoping and praying that she'll meet him someday
She is so lonely and always will mourn
Until she shall meet him around God’s Throne
                  (Chorus)
There's a bright star that is shining
It's shining so bright
It went to heaven early one night
The angel's are singing in God's Great Band
And I know Dad's resting in the Promise Land

Sing and rejoice, O daughter of Zion: for, lo, I come, and I will dwell in the midst of thee, saith the Lord (Zechariah 2:10 KJV)

Happy Father’s Day

I Love You Son

I think of the horror he must have felt to see his daddy dead,

  From a ghastly self-inflicted wound to the head.

A terrible sight for just a lad,

  Boyhood, manhood, and fatherhood for him were sad.

This helped me better understand why he struggled to say,

  I love you son and be a great Christian some day.

I wonder how many times as a small boy he was told,

  I love you son, grow big, strong, and bold.

These words from him to me were rare and few in between,

  However, I never doubted his love or felt that he treated me mean.

I knew daddy loved me and as his first-born, he was proud of me,

  There were too many photographs of daddy showing me off you see.

Pictures of pickups, horses, and tractors testify to that fact,

  That many years passed without him saying he loved me, before he patted me on the back.

I was married with children of my own bringing joy into my life,

  When he said, “I love you son” filled my heart with delight.

As his son many days came and went with me having that great desire,

  To hunt, fish, just doing something with him even if were changing a tire.

Many times in my youth, I would get the ball and glove,

  Wanting more than playing ball, I really wanted to share his love.

Day in and day out, I begged him to play,

  But would say he was too tired, too old, or say wait another day.

He was big, strong, and tough as evidenced in his scars,

  I wanted to be like him in many ways especially “fixing” cars.

His younger days without his dad were wild and rough,

  Cussing, fighting, drinking, and wild women he could not get enough.

As my dad his vises were down to cussing and telling lies,

  However, I only saw his hurt of not having a dad in his life in my young eyes.

I was a sissy, cry baby and he worried his first born would be a runt,

   If he could see me now, his words would be very blunt, followed by a big grunt.

No one questioned how he felt about a situation or where he stood,

  He was wise and discerning, but sometimes I wondered if his head was wood.

I grew bigger and taller than he ever imagined me to be,

  But in my mind, he is daddy and will always be a big man to me.

In my youth I worked hard and trained because I wanted to make him glad,

  So one day we arm-wrestled and I finally beat, but his reaction was sad.

I thought he would be happy for me to win,

  Nevertheless, I saw the hurt and sadness, not a smile of a father’s grin.

I wished I had just given him a tough fight,

  Moreover, let him win and not take away his glory and might.

I wanted so much for him to be so proud,

  So he could wolf and brag about his son when in a crowd.

I wanted love and affirmation,

  And not money, not cars, and not even a beach vacation.

My desire, the one that was number one,

  Was hearing daddy say, “I love you son.”

I was Christian and my daddy was lost,

  I prayed for God to save him regardless of cost.

The cries, the pleas, and the prayers were not for naught,

  When daddy told the preacher Jesus his soul, he had bought.

The news of his decision brought amen’s, hallelujahs, and tears,

  Then suddenly the answer to prayer filled my heart with fears.

The cost of salvation is a price that is high,

  For God at Calvary in Jesus our sin did die.

For daddy the cost for him to find Jesus was not cheap,

  He accepted his wound to the head, a tumor, without bitterness, not even a peep.

He had made me proud when he asked Jesus into his heart,

  However, the sting of the cancer struck me like a fiery dart.

He served Jesus for two years after his surgery to the head,

  He had a great testimony as I sat with him at his deathbed.

The week had started with me feeding him peas, potatoes, cornbread, and tea,

  Him not speaking a word, I fed him with delight remembering he once did it for me.

So as the dawn of that Friday was the rise of the sun,

  I held his hand as he took his last breath and raised with Jesus the Son.

As I held that big old hand one last time, my hand seemed so small,

  For in my mind I was a little boy and daddy so big, strong, and tall.

I said, “I love you daddy” as the nurse said there is no heart beat, no not one,

  Then I remembered the word of his heart as he said, “I love you son.”

I have written this Father’s Day poem so you can do something for me,

  Fathers and children look at one another and tell me what you see.

Dad, do you see children, who want to hear,

 The words “I love you” from a father so dear.

Boys, do you see a dad, who to you is so big and strong,

  Tell him you love him, and boys that is not wrong.

Girls, do you see a dad that has hugged you and held you to his chest,

  Remember when he says, “I love you Hon,” that each boy in your life must pass dad’s test.

Mom, do you see the dad of your children and the joy you share,

  He needs your love and affirmation to be the man to thread where eagles dare.

Today the sermon may be short and sweet, the message plain to see,

  Remember that to be together in heaven like Jesus we must be.

For when John baptized Jesus, a new course was set to run,

  God the Father said to Jesus, “I love you son.”

Matthew 3:17 says, “And lo a voice from saying, this is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased.”